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24 Reasons that Bicycles are Better Than Your Mate

  1. Bicycles don't get pregnant
  2. You can ride bicycles any time of the month
  3. Bicycles don't have parents
  4. Bicycles won't whine unless something is really wrong
  5. You can share a bicycle with friends
  6. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have ridden
  7. When riding, you and your bicycle arrive at the same time
  8. Bicycles don't mind how many other bicycles you have
  9. Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycles
  10. Bicycles don't care if you buy bicycle magazines
  11. If your bicycle goes flat you can fix it
  12. If your bicycle is too loose you can tighten it up
  13. If your bicycle is misaligned you don't have to discuss politics with it
  14. You can ride other friend's bicycles and still stay friends
  15. If you say bad things to your bicycle you don't have to apologize before you can ride it again
  16. You can ride your bicycle for as long as you want and it won't get sore
  17. You can stop riding your bicycle as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated
  18. Your mother won't stay in touch with your bicycle after you dump it
  19. Bicycles don't get headaches
  20. Bicycles don't insult you if you are a bad rider
  21. Bicycles don't care if you are late
  22. You don't have to take a shower before you ride a bicycle
  23. You can ride your bicycle the first time you meet it without having to take it our to dinner, see a movie, or meet its parents
  24. When in mixed company you can talk about the great rides you've had