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Tuesday, July 25, 2000 Volume 9. Issue 4

Denver Biker Substitutes Beer for Orange Juice Rainmakers - Love' em or Hate 'em
Greenfield, IA - Steve, the Denver connection on Teamartini, woke and decided to substitute Miller Lite for orange juice as his morning drink. While there was a half-gallon of orange juice and a half-gallon of milk in the cooler, Steve decided on the frothy drink from Milwaukee. "What was I supposed to do, I had to drive that morning," Steve stated. After the early morning of rain left Steve's tent dry, he had another reason to celebrate. On the highways of Iowa you will find many personal likes and dislikes: No Passing Zones, cattle feed lots and The Rainmakers. Dixie from the Big "F" Club was one of those happy souls who enjoyed an afternoon of listening to the latter. For miles Rick and Dixie chatted about the wonders of a quartet from Kansas City. Memories flooded back with each song. Nothing like some good music to make the miles melt away. Rick has said that giving people an enjoyable alternative to the shit that Teams Budweiser and Diego play makes lugging that extra 25 pounds worth it. As for the guy in Stuart who hated the music, Rick sends a loud "Bite me, doughboy!"

Granger, What the Hell? Free Beer Entices Young Christian Bikers
Granger, IA - Martini Rick pulled into Granger early Tuesday afternoon and ran into the hot chick division of Team Die Hard. After sharing some very spicy burritos, the crew retired to the bar of imports and $1 beers. Rick decided to have one of each of the better variety while the girls were downing some Rick's (hard lemonade). The mood quickly turned to Fizzler distribution and sticker exchanges. Die Hard Abby felt the need to show off some guys harry chest to Die Hard Maralee. This did not go over well with hairy man's girlfriend. That girl got the "c" bomb dropped on her by the group. After a couple hours of making friends, excluding the c-girl, the rest of the Martinis showed up and made Rick switch to $1. His time of being a beer snob had come to an end. Near Polk City, IA - A small ballfield off Highway F-31 turned into a haven of intoxication late Tuesday afternoon. A group of bikers hammering into Ankeny to hit the evening prayer service were diverted into the field with promises of feeling divine. Mishearing it as seeing the divine one (because they had already been tricked at the bar Granger many times), they pulled over quickly. After the Team Chickman truck pulled up, the odds of some of these bikers making it in before nightfall became slim. There's always another prayer service tomorrow.

Hurricane Nearly Destroys Town Today's Naughty Bits and Pieces
Ankeny, IA - In what weatherman Willard Scott called "fucking amazing," a small hurricane blew threw the midwestern town of Ankeny during the early hours of Tuesday. Steve and Bryan had just gotten to the overnight house thanks to the talkabout wielding jeep crew. The team made sure that the tents were securely staked to the ground, but the high-profile ho house (a large tent that houses the female members of Teamartini) had to be taken down lest it be swept away to Ames. The sustained high winds were loud enough to awaken a sound asleep Rick who was camping in the living room of the Blocks in front of the television. Host Mark suggested that the team stay inside for the night, but brave souls Damian and Steve decided to ride it out. It didn't take long for the rest of the team to take Mark up: Rick went back to his spot, Bryan found a spot to mummify in Abby's toy corner and Linda located a spot that had absolutely no snoring whatsoever.
  • The Team Angry bus was no longer broken down outside of Stuart
  • Bike trail from Redfield to Adel was a nice change of pace
  • Adel...the town that ran out of meat at lunchtime
  • Adel...the town that sent us over a bridge that disconnected Rick's stereo
  • Adel...the town that caused Joey to jump out of Rick's bag
  • Thank you Arva and CO2 for the beer in Dallas Center...sorry about the Poison on the tape
  • Punk rock makes Rick bike real fast...even Poison
  • That Chickenman special brew was an amber delight
  • Mapquest doesn't know shit about Ankeny
  • Little Abby is not going to sleep on time...she can do some more coloring with Rick in the morning
  • Team needs to get a bigger or heavier tarp to cover bikes when the weather turns severe